女士們考慮把我們的孩子放到第一位，對嗎？如果你問我，在YourTango 網(wǎng)的一項單身母親的民意調(diào)查會給你令人安慰的答案。25%的單身母親或是離婚母親沒有愛或沒有關(guān)系的性并感到這樣有助于她們有性生活的發(fā)展。然而，13%的回應(yīng)者認為沒有愛或是承諾是不會發(fā)生性關(guān)系的，所以自我抑制。
Oh boy. 13% of you could be waiting a long time…
哦，孩子。13%的單身母親要等更長的時間……
Related: How I Learned About Sex: A lesson in what not to do
講述：怎樣學(xué)習(xí)性：不該做的經(jīng)驗
I'm a divorced, single mother. After I split with my ex, I was so broken down emotionally, sex was the last thing on my mind. I know some people (especially men) are able to jump out of their marriages into multiple beds, but I didn't. Because I couldn't. But eventually I did want to start having sex again, and so I waited until the right moment came along and had a perfectly bland textbook one-night stand. And I'm so happy it happened that way. His semi-hard whiskey dick provided exactly the gentle nudge I needed to get back in the game. (He was lovely, the whole thing lovely and very sweet really, but in hindsight I think he may have been married. No ring though. Not my fault!)
我是個離婚的單身母親。在我和前夫離婚后，我的情緒非常低落，性是我腦子里唯一剩下的東西。我知道一些人（尤其是男人）有婚外情，但我沒有。因為我不能。但最終我想再次開始性生活，所以我等待知道那個對的時刻到來一個完美單調(diào)的一夜的停留。我樂于以這樣的方式進行。他的半硬的陰莖給我恰到好處輕柔的刺激，那正式我想得到的。（他是可愛的，整件事情都是甜蜜而富有愛意的，但是事后，我想他可能已經(jīng)結(jié)婚了。但沒有看到他的戒指，不是我的錯。）
Anyway, the great thing about co-parenting with an ex is that it allows you both to have sexy time. (With other people. Not with each other. That's something you should never do! Though I did think about it once. I asked my ex to have sex with me and he said okay, but then we started talking and I made him cry about how he'd mistreated me, and that was so much better than an orgasm.) A few weeks after I popped my divorce cherry, I saw the opportunity for another one-nighter and took advantage. Eventually I started dating someone, and though it didn't work out long-term, we had so much sex. Makeup sex. Not the kind of sex you have after a fight, the kind of sex you have after you haven't had that kind of sex for years. The kind of sex that makes you happy to be alive. The kind of sex that makes you want to let your kid have ice cream for breakfast. The kind of sex where you're angry and crying and laughing all at the same time! (Oh, just me? Okay.)
不管怎樣，和前夫共同養(yǎng)育子女最棒的事是可以有迷人的性感時間。（和其他人，不是和某人彼此。那是你從沒做過的事！雖然我只想過一次。我請求我的前夫和我做愛，他說好，但是后來我們開始談話我談到他不公的對待使他大叫，這比性高潮更好。）離婚后的幾個禮拜，我看到了另一個一夜情的機會并抓住機會。最終我開始和人約會，即使這不是長期有效，我們做了很多次。做愛，不是在爭吵后的那種性，是那種在你很多年都沒發(fā)生過性后的那種。它是你感到愉悅和活著的樂趣。這種性使你想讓你的孩子用冰淇淋當(dāng)早餐。這種性使你在同一時間生氣，狂叫，大笑。（好吧，這就是我嗎？）
Related: 10 reasons he still wants sex while you're pregnant
講述：當(dāng)你懷孕是他還要做愛的十個原因
Now that we've stopped seeing each other, I don't know when I'll have sex again, and I don't really care. I like sex as much or more than the next guy, but I have to feel comfortable with someone to have sex with them, so that means really random one-nighters are out of the question. (And probably aren't very safe, anyway.) YourTango suggests "friends with benefits" as a healthy solution, but I don't know. So many of my gal pals have stories of those types of relationships going wrong. The common notion is, "someone always gets hurt," because it's hard to have sex without getting emotional (just nod your head and play along, fellas). So I guess I'll just have to wait this one out and see what happens. When my daughter's away, maybe I'll go to a movie with one of those moms who's abstaining 'til she finds true love. I'm sure she could use a pick me up.
既然我們已經(jīng)停下來看看彼此，我不知道什么時候在要做愛，我也不關(guān)心。我想有比跟下個人更多的性，但我和他們做愛要感到舒服，那意味著一夜情不在話下。（不管怎樣可能不是很安全。） YourTango 網(wǎng)上說炮友像是健康隱患，但我不這么認為。很多我的女友這種類型的關(guān)系變得不好。普遍的觀念是總有人受傷，因為很難沒有感情而發(fā)生性（只是點頭之交一塊玩樂的伙伴）。所以我想我必須等待這個人出現(xiàn)然后看能發(fā)生什么。當(dāng)我女兒離開時，也許我會和以為不找到真愛就自我抑制的單身母親去看電影。我確定她會時常帶上我。1
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