【專題名稱】中學(xué)外語教與學(xué)【專 題 號】G381【復(fù)印期號】2010年11期【原文出處】《高考：理科版》(長春)2010年7期第25～27頁【作者簡介】胡湘華，北京大學(xué)附屬中學(xué)。【關(guān) 鍵 詞】EEUU
特別提示：
英語寫作是英語語言綜合運(yùn)用能力的重要體現(xiàn)，是衡量考生英語水平的重要標(biāo)準(zhǔn)?？忌Z言要素綜合應(yīng)用在高考英語書面表達(dá)中占有很大的比重，今年6月筆者通過批閱書面表達(dá)情景作文，發(fā)現(xiàn)有很多考生書面表達(dá)應(yīng)用能力較弱，丟分較多，令閱卷老師倍感遺憾。
在緊張的四天實(shí)判中，筆者閱了近2000份試卷，總體印象是：一檔作文（18～20分）約占0.3%；二檔作文（15～17分）中16分以上的大約為1.25%，二檔下限的約占1.5%；三檔作文（12～14分）有4%左右；四檔作文（6～11分）偏多，五檔作文（1～5分）約10%；0分作文約1.5%。從這些數(shù)據(jù)中不難看出，考生的書面表達(dá)能力提升空間很大。如何才能提高高三學(xué)生的書面表達(dá)能力呢？
首先，讓我們一起看看在2010年高考英語判卷過程中發(fā)現(xiàn)的考生們在作文表達(dá)中所出現(xiàn)的問題。
附寫作題目：
第四部分：第一節(jié)情景作文（20分）
假設(shè)你是紅星中學(xué)高二(1)班的學(xué)生李華，利用上周末的時間幫助祖父母安排了去北戴河的旅行。請根據(jù)以下四幅圖的先后順序，寫一篇英文周記，敘述你從準(zhǔn)備到送行的全過程。
注意：1.周記的開頭已為你寫好。
2.詞數(shù)不少于60。
Last weekend, I helped my grandparents prepare their trip to Beidaihe.
【作文表達(dá)中的主要問題分析】
1.審題能力的問題
主要表現(xiàn)在：
(1)時間錯：last weekend寫成last Monday；
(2)人稱錯：grandparents寫成parents；把“I”寫成Li Hua或“he”。如：Li Hua bought the tickets.
(3)基本常識弱：不認(rèn)識鐵路標(biāo)志，train寫成bus，truck或subway；
(4)時態(tài)混亂：一般過去時和一般現(xiàn)在時、一般將來時混用。如：First I searched the Internet and then book the hotel.I knew my grandparents will like their trip.
(5)漏要點(diǎn)或細(xì)節(jié)。
2.語言基本功的問題
(1)語法不規(guī)范，搭配不到位：I went to the railway station to bought two tickets./I helped my grandma found out the clothes, glasses./My grandpa wanted like.（賓語從句語序錯、時態(tài)錯）
(2)掌握的詞匯量達(dá)不到規(guī)定的要求，造成詞不達(dá)意，句子成分殘缺不全或用詞不當(dāng)。如：
In the same time, my grandparents wanted to know what was the weather and where can live.（正確：At the same time/Besides, my grandparents wanted to know what the weather was like and where they could live.）
(3)無段落層次，上下文連貫性不強(qiáng)，缺少過渡關(guān)聯(lián)詞：I used the computer to book the ticket. I went to buy 2 tickets. I prepared two glasses for them. （恰表達(dá)：First I used the computer to book the tickets on-line in advance. Then I went to the nearest train station to pick the 2 tickets. On my way home I bought two pairs of sunglasses for my grandparents. ）
(4)拼寫錯誤多，漢式英語大量存在。
(5)書寫不清楚，潦草、涂改，很難辨認(rèn)。
【作文表達(dá)高分策略】
為避免以上出現(xiàn)的問題，我們可以采取以下策略：
1.審題——審中文信息和圖片信息，抓要點(diǎn)和細(xì)節(jié)
2010高考北京卷情景作文試題分析表
2.寫對簡單句，然后學(xué)會在此基礎(chǔ)上擴(kuò)句
擴(kuò)充句子時，可以使用較高級詞匯。注意看劃橫線的詞匯、詞組。We first came up with some common issues when travelling such as the weather condition, the hotel information and how to obtain the best train tickets.
再看下面句子的修改：I found the information and then bought two tickets.-After collecting the information ,I succeeded in buying two tickets to the destination on my own.
3.注意句子間的邏輯關(guān)系，使用恰當(dāng)?shù)倪B接詞
如：The following day, I went to the nearest train station to buy tickets for my grandparents. Since there were so many people queuing, I had to wait for nearly an hour before I finally got two tickets by the window. The whole process was boring and tiring, but nothing could compete with the joy of helping my grandparents.
4.建立寫作積累本，堅(jiān)持寫作和修改練習(xí)同步
同學(xué)們可以建立一個寫作積累本，把平時看到的精美范文、寫作常用的詞匯、句型和過渡語加以整合、歸類，并把它們當(dāng)作日常學(xué)習(xí)中朗讀、背誦、抄寫、仿寫、復(fù)習(xí)、欣賞的素材。除此之外，經(jīng)常動筆練習(xí)寫作，并且動手修改自己的作文，也是促進(jìn)寫作的好方法。在修改作文的過程中，請加強(qiáng)理解和吸收書面信息的能力，了解動詞是句子靈魂的特點(diǎn)，避免句子結(jié)構(gòu)中動詞用法錯誤，使表達(dá)出來的句子不缺少動詞或不把其他詞類誤用為動詞。例如：My grandparents would by train to Beidaihe.（正確：My grandparents would go to Beidaihe by train./My grandparents would take the train to Beidaihe.）
5.充分利用課本資源，對課文中的重點(diǎn)句、重點(diǎn)段落進(jìn)行理解和背誦
從北師大版教材模塊一第1課中摘出的句子和段落：
I normally wake up about five minutes before my alarm clock goes off.（這個句子有副詞修飾，運(yùn)用了兩個動詞短語，并且用連詞before連接兩個簡單句，增加了句子的含金量。如果我們把這樣的句子記住了，并且知道如何運(yùn)用，就能寫出屬于我們自己的漂亮句子。）
I am always the first person to get to the office. The mornings are always very busy and the afternoons are even busier! Meetings and phone calls take up a large part of the day. Every minute of the day is filled with urgent matters. By around eight o' clock, I usually find some time to do my own paperwork and answer some personal e-mails.（雖然是寫“我”的事，請注意斜體“物”作主語的寫作方式：主語使用得體而有變化，避免了總是“I”開頭的單調(diào)句子。）
總之，英語書面表達(dá)能力的提高是一個長期積累、慢速提高的過程，需要平時大量的語言積累。這個習(xí)慣的養(yǎng)成對于高三寫作的提高非常重要。只要同學(xué)們提前做好準(zhǔn)備，就一定能在2011年高考寫作中取得優(yōu)異的成績。
附高考學(xué)生范文兩篇：
A
Last weekend, I helped my grandparents prepare their trip to Beidaihe.
last Saturday morning, I looked for some informations about hotel, train ticket and weather condition, which my grandparents cared of. In the afternoon, I went to the train station to buy two tickets for my grandparents. The ticket was for Sunday afternoon. So we had enough time to prepare necessary things. Although my grandmother had already packed the clothes box, I checked it again and added some important things, like umbrella, sunglasses and map. On the Sunday afternoon, I sended my grandparents to the train to Beidaihe. I was very happy to do the things for my grandparents,I really wanted my grandparents to have a great time ! (108 words)
（點(diǎn)評：基本完成了試題規(guī)定的任務(wù)，4個要點(diǎn)全面，分別有細(xì)節(jié)支撐，語法和用詞有一些錯誤，但不影響理解。該篇是三檔作文。）
B
Last weekend, I helped my grandparents prepare their trip to Beidaihe. In order to make a full preparation for the travelling,I,together with my grandparents, surfed the Internet to get some useful information, such as the weather, tickets, and hotel in advance. Having known the train tickets information, I hurried to the train station nearby to buy two tickets successfully. With the tickets in hand, I found my one hour' s waiting in line finally paid off. Nothing could compete with the joy of helping my grandparents.
Back home, I helped grandma to prepare for their departure. She had already packed some shirts and comfortable shoes for walking on the sand. I suggested that they bring a map of Beidaihe so as to save their time when heading for somewhere. Two pairs of sunglasses were essential for walking by the sea, so I also reminded them to take them. When I was finishing packing, grandma told me that an umbrella should be included in case there might be unexpected rain. The next day, I accompanied my grandparents to the train station and they were ready for their holiday with the well-packed suitcase happily. Sitting on the train, they waved to me, smiling broadly. They thanked me for my hard work and we bid goodbye to each other.
I was very proud of myself in terms of helping my grandparents and doing my own bits to make them live happier. I will do more for the elderly. (246words)
（點(diǎn)評；完全完成了試題規(guī)定的任務(wù)，達(dá)到了預(yù)期的寫作目的。覆蓋了所有的內(nèi)容，并有細(xì)節(jié)支撐；使用句式和詞匯多樣，表達(dá)內(nèi)容連貫、豐富，結(jié)構(gòu)緊湊，有極個別的錯誤，但為表達(dá)豐富內(nèi)容所致。該篇是一檔作文。）
高考試題參考范文：
Last weekend, I helped my grandparents prepare their trip to Beidaihe. On Saturday morning, together with my grandparents, I searched the Internet for the train schedule,the weather in Beidaihe, and some hotel information. In the afternoon, I went to the train station and managed to buy two tickets for my grandparents although there was a long queue. After dinner, I packed into the suitcase the things my grandparents need, such as clothes, glasses, an umbrella, and a map. The next morning, I went to the station to see them off. Waving goodbye to them on the platform, I felt happy for them and wished them a safe journey.^NU1DA20101224
